I’ve been sleeping too well lately. But I’m still always tired. Maybe I’ve just been sleeping too much, but not actually well? Sleep shouldn’t work that way. I don’t know that it does. I don’t know that it doesn’t. I just know that I sleep all the time. I just know that I’m tired all the time.
My left shoulder hurts. I can’t lie down comfortably.
I just looked at her Instagram page. I like the pictures of her where she isn’t meant to look beautiful because she somehow looks more beautiful. Her fucking smile. No words.
I have work in a little over an hour. Sometime after work I’ll record a podcast with Chris. I’m not sure how I feel about any of those right now. I feel too lazy and tired and dumb to work and I feel too tired and unfunny to podcast. I feel uninteresting too. There was a time when I was funny. I guess that’s the one that matters the most to me.
My direct superior at work is shaped oddly. Not like she’s fat, if that’s the first thing that came to your mind. She’s in excellence shape actually, but the shapes are weird. Her muscles look odd. Her chin looks odd. Her shoulders look odd. Odd isn’t always a bad thing. I’m not convinced odd is even a bad thing the majority of the time. She’s far more attractive than I care for.
I wrote a girl on Facebook today. I haven’t talked to her in a while. We talk, then we don’t talk, then we talk some more, then we don’t talk. I told her to text me or message me back or call me or whatever, just talk to me because I miss her in my life. And I do. She wrote me back saying her life is too messed up right now to talk. My life feels more messed up than it ever has before. That’s why I wanted to talk to her.