1-17-14

I went 3 for 5.

So I guess I didn’t do too terribly on my goals yesterday (today. Why am I referring to today as yesterday already?). Surprisingly I did wake up at ten and after sticking three frozen waffles (I toasted them first) together with honey flavored peanut butter I stuff them in my mouth, washed them down with some cheap instant coffee, and then got in a little exercise before picking a topic (after showering…in case you were curious) for the podcast and researching it more than I usually do.

            The topic I choose was memories, and Christopher did polyamory, and it made for a pretty good episode, and I’m a pretty harsh critic when it comes to judging the episodes (because around half of the episode is made up of my words and I hate most things I say).

            I didn’t write though. I’m not sure why I’m struggling so much with writing. The easy (and correct) answer would be to say I’m a combination of dumb, lazy and unmotivated, but I think it’s something deeper than that. I have no reason to believe it’s something deeper than that, but I feel like saying it’s something deeper lends a kind of mysteriousness to my life that I’m sorely lacking. As Einstein once said, “A life without mystery is a life without history.” Okay, he never said that, nor did anybody as far as I know because it doesn’t really make sense (although plenty of things that don’t make sense have been said and repeated many times).

            We don’t have to get into my troubles with masturbation. Not troubles in terms of not being able to get it up (more like troubles in not being able to keep it down), not really that either, but I do need to keep my hands occupied with something else so they’ll stop being so occupied with my penis. But come on, can you really blame my hands for that? Yes. You could even go as far as making a case for insanity. But enough about my wily hands. But also a little bit more. It’s not like I’m doing it 3 or 4 times a day (usually), but when you accomplish as little as I do in a day even twice takes up valuable time I could be using towards something positive, like showering myself with negativity (it gets me in the right mood to be productive…or sit around listening to sad music, which apparently I consider productive).

            Tomorrow I’ll be hanging out with my friends for a large chunk of the day, so I don’t have too many goals, but I have just enough (whatever the hell that means).

1) Wake up at 9 Am – it’s not 1:30 yet, so I could reasonably fall asleep by 3 and get six hours of sleep, which is something (despite claims by my high school self of it being nothing). Six is about what I got last night, so I have reason to believe I can do it again.

2) Exercise – It’s Friday, and I’m not used to exercising on Friday for numerous reasons (to be honest I’m not used to working out on most days, not that that makes a difference anyway? or does it? I don’t know how things work), so maybe my body and mind will just completely reject the idea of exercising and find a way for me to weasel out of it. But I mustn’t. I must persist and get in shape so women will like me…um, I mean I’m doing it completely for myself, so I feel sexy. I don’t at all care what other people think, except, yeah, I do. Justin Bieber is relatively short, but he got in shape and millions of people love him and I assume it’s because he’s in good shape and not at all because he’s a hardworking (I assume) famous singer, even though he was super famous before he got in shape (much like hunky McHunkster Zac Efron of High School Musical fame). Can we please stop liking assholes even if they can dance? The Biebs is a douche (arguably I am too for referring to him as ‘The Biebs’), there’s ample evidence of him being a douche now. Do people just ignore it, or do they not care?

3 Write, God damn it, write – I won’t have much time to fit writing in before I hang with my friends, but maybe my goal is to write a little something for Youtube so I can maybe start making some videos again. Or maybe I’ll even just sit on my butt and try to focus on writing some tweets to help keep The Sarcast twitter feed active in the potentiality of garnering new listeners. I’ll be happy with writing anything as long as I’m writing (besides this crap, of course).

Sweet dreams (that’s my sign off, this isn’t part of my sign off, although maybe it will be…also, can the last words of a blog be called a sign off?)

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About Danniel

http://closertoclarity.com/
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