On this week, or maybe last week, or many many weeks ago, or quite possibly some time in future weeks, of the podcast Chris and I got together to discuss items that no one, including ourselves, care about, such as the whole debacle with the football player who you’d only know if you watched a lot of football or were from the New England area, Ron Gronkowski (he’s not super unknown, but little known enough for someone who watches football religiously every week to mistake his name for Ron, when it’s Rob) and up and – this seems like an obvious place to insert cumming but I’m going to stick with – coming pornstar Bibi Jones, who I had better known under the name of Britney Beth.
The reason this became a news item was because pictures surfaced of a shirtless Rob Gronkowski with Bibi Jones who was wearing his football jersey. The Kraft family, owners of the New England Patriots and not the best store bought Mac and Cheese – that’s right bitch, I said what we were all thinking – weren’t pleased with this, because apparently we’re all supposed to believe these athletes who make millions of dollars and are in great shape don’t sleep with slutty woman, or at least maybe they do, but God forbid they sleep with a porn star, because porn stars are so much worse than your average slutty woman.
Okay, a little tangent that might turn into a big tangent bur probably not, but actually probably will if I don’t actually ever get to the tangent. I think I respect female porn stars more than general slutty woman, not that I necessarily disrespect either of them. First of all we can’t over look that porn stars provide the highest of pleasure to boys going through puberty and middle aged men in sexless marriages, which by the way probably helps keeps the cheating numbers down – when woman cheat I think they usually want more than sex, but when men cheat it’s almost always about sex, at least this is what I gather from hearing stories and knowing a few people who have cheated, so instead of a guy having to go out and look for a situation where he can cheat, because this isn’t like Mad Men where every woman Don Draper runs into is powerless to is sex aura, which is essentially him giving off the vibe of, “Yes, you want to fuck me, I know it, you know it, but I don’t give a fuck, and you do,” the real life guy instead just browses the internet and watches women perform acts that he’d never get to experience in real life, so this sounds crazy, and obviously I exaggerate a little, but porn helps save marriages.
Also, and this is still part of the tangent but I’m starting a new paragraph because people tend to hate large paragraphs, also people seem to hate when the writer describes their thought process, also people hate when people tell them what they hate, porn stars are looked down on because they get paid for sex, which is basically prostitution, except they don’t get paid by the person having sex with them, they essentially get paid by the people watching them, so they’re one level beyond strippers, take the viewers away and they don’t exist – by the way, I think prostitution should be legal and regulated and what the hell, why not taxed. So what’s the difference between a slut and a porn star? The porn star respects their self enough, and isn’t ashamed, to actually ask for money. Again, in both situations I don’t necessarily disrespect the person. I don’t necessarily want a girl who likes to mess around with a lot of boys, although it seems that’s what I’m most attracted to, but I find that out after the fact, and if you’re one of the girls I’ve liked and you read this I apologize, but back to not disrespecting these people, a person can do whatever they want to their body as long as it’s not hurting someone else. So sleep with whoever you want, however many times as you want, just as long as they’re not already in a relationship which you’re trying to ruin, which segues me back into what I was originally talking about.
Bibi Jones is apparently known for sleeping with athletes, and not just young guys like Rob Gronkowski, but athletes who are married, which is someone I very much don’t respect, and will forever make it hard – not in the way you’re thinking pervert…yes, that was addressed to me – for me to watch the porn star who was on her way to becoming my favorite.
That’s why this was a big story to me, because I had recently been admiring the works of Britney Beth, who I later found out was Bibi Jones, who I later found out is not so decent of a person. Again, I don’t care that she’s in porn, and I don’t care that she sleeps with a lot of athletes, but I can’t get over her sleeping with married guys. What makes this worse is that after doing all this research (research equals hours of porn) hey, in order to find out who a person really is you need to find out how their insides work, and I definitely got a real good look at her insides, some would say a much deeper look than I really cared for…I would say that. But after all this I found out she’s from Scottsdale Arizona, which makes sense that she hooked up with Rob Gronkowski because he went to the University of Arizona, but how this relates to me is that my former love who’ve I’ve spoken about a lot on this blog lives in Scottsdale, so now anytime I see Bibi Jones I’m gonna think of my former love, which means that I can no longer have sex with Bibi Jones, not that I want to anymore, or ever did because she was in porn and therefore I could never compete sexually, but had she been a decent person we could have cuddled. I don’t care how big those dicks she had were, they can’t cuddle like I can. But now she can kiss my cuddling ass goodbye, because I ain’t no cuddle whore.
Click here to listen to the podcast where me and my friend Chris talk about this, Ron Paul, The only black republican – no offense other black republicans…I say as if there are really other black republicans – and all sorts of other stuff.