#10 Belt by Say Anything
This is the sixteenth Say Anything song on my list, so you know what that means, there’s only one Say Anything song left on the list because I limited myself to seventeen Say Anything songs because seventeen is my favorite number and Say Anything is my favorite band – seventeen isn’t my favorite number and I didn’t limit myself to a certain amount of songs for any one band, but Say Anything is my favorite band, so I’m not a complete liar.
I don’t really like opening to my favorite album ever, that being Is A Real Boy, the album this song comes off of, only because it’s roughly thirty seconds of talking, talking that isn’t terrible, but isn’t great when you listen to it over and over again. The opening talking is on the same track as this song, a fucking amazing song, and a fucking amazing song to open the best album of all time with – of course that’s my opinion, but I don’t really need to state that its my opinion, of course because we all know my opinion is factual, and therefore never wrong (except of course for always). I wouldn’t have even minded if it was on a separate track so I could just skip that track – I wrote this paragraph before I realized the version I would use from youtube doesn’t contain the opening talk, which I’m surprisingly disappointed about because I wanted you to be able to hear it.
The end of this song where he yells, “What’s say you and all your friends meet all of my friends in the ally tonight. What’s say you and all your friends step up to my friends in the ally tonight,” is pretty amazing. It never ceases to pump me up (seems like an easier way to say that is “it pumps me up”) no, I prefer double negatives (is that even a double negative?) How would I know?
As stated by Max Bemis before the song, the song is a song about rebellion. I’m a constant rebeller, and apparently that’s not a word, but it’s what I am. But I don’t rebel in all the normal ways, like getting tattoos, or drinking before 21, or sucking a bunch of dicks while thinking, “This will show my father,” (do girls ever think that while giving blow jobs?) No, but I think a lot of guys think it while sucking dick. Haha, not me of course lol (?) the lol and haha are supposed to come off as nervous laughter which makes you think that I really do suck dick, which I don’t lmfao (?) the lmfao is just because I love that band with their party rock song….except I hate that song. But seriously, I hate that song, and also I don’t suck dick, but my original joke for if I did would be that I don’t think about rebelling against my dad – not that gay people do because that would kind of be implying that they’re being gay just because of that and therefore its their choice and that’s not what I’m implying at all because I don’t think that guys choose to be gay because look how beautiful women are, no guy would ever willingly choose a guy over a girl, not that you gay guys out there aren’t also pretty, I’m just saying women are far more beautiful, but don’t feel bad gay guys, if I was gay I would totally bone all of you, even the fatties (anway…) – I would be thinking, “Oh my God I would rather be doing any other gay sexual act, including being banged in the ass, than sucking dick.” True story.
I rebel just because I have to do the opposite of what should be done in my life. Oh, people get jobs and learn to drive and have sex? Well I’m gonna be 24 and live at home and walk places and girls aren’t going to like me even though I really want them too. Cell phones give off bad radiation? Well I’m going to sleep with mine next to my head because I want to wake up in case someone calls me, even though no one, especially girls, ever calls me, and when I’m awake I’m putting that useless cell phone next to my testicles, but it’s not useless now, it’s keeping me from passing on anymore of my horrible genetics. That alone makes me a much better man than my father. What’s this you say, exercise is good? Ass, this is the couch. Couch, this is my ass. Get to know each other, because you two are going to be spending a lot of quality time together. Bacon, my mouth, I believe you two are already well acquainted.
But in all seriousness, or at least some seriousness, I am a contrarian, so I argue about things I don’t even really care about far too much, which is kind of a form of rebellion. It’s refusing to go along with what the other person is saying just because you want to be different from them, or piss them off, or because they’re sleeping with the girl you want to be sleeping with – that’s why I had to change it from all seriousness to some seriousness.
I’m done. I have nothing to say about rebellion. I’m a boring person with few stories and even fewer sexually transmitted diseases.