#16 Alive With The Glory Of Love by Say Anything
“When I watch you, I want to do you right where you’re standing, right on the foyer, on this dark day, right in plain view of the whole ghetto. The boots stomp meadows, but we ignore that. You’re lovely, baby. This war is crazy. I won’t let you down. Hell no, I won’t let them take you.”
I have been executing this week with an extremely proficient amount of laziness. Just half an hour ago I started working out only to stop after about two minutes due to nothing other than not really feeling like working out. I only made it two minutes because I spent that time trying to argue myself into continuing to work out. Instead I compromised and told myself, “Okay you complete piece of shit, if you aren’t going to work out you’re at least going to write, because there’s no way I’m going to let you be a complete piece of shit for the day.” And I of course responded, “But you started off by calling me a complete piece of shit?” And I of course responded with, “Yes, you are a complete piece of shit in life, but for the day perhaps you can actually accomplish something.” And I of course responded, “Oh.”
So here I am, writing, but without any idea of what I’m going to write about. You’d think, or at least there was a time when I’d think, this song would easily springboard me into thousands of, at least nonsensical, topics I could get four or five not completely unworthwhile paragraphs out of. But no, my mind is wrought with nothingness other than a vague recollection of how the word wrought can properly be used.
My floor is covered in papers. Old papers wrought with incomplete ideas for things I’ll never do. My room is small and I never throw anything out, even notebooks that my kitty peed on more than a year ago. I threw that notebook deep in my closet and recently pulled it out, flipped through it, and commented to myself, “Really, even though this is covered in kitty pee I found these ideas worth keeping?” Honestly, I think they are worth keeping. I have not an idea what those ideas actually were, but they could springboard into greater ideas that actually turn into something someday. I don’t know what it is with me and not throwing things away. Hoarders are popular these days. I don’t think I’ll be the level of appearing on the show, but I do have a problem. Just hours ago I was hesitant to throw away a stray piece of paper with nothing but math problems on it from over a year ago. When would I ever need that paper again? Never, is the answer. Yet it took me explaining to myself for 15 seconds that there would never in my life be a situation where that piece of paper would be of use to me before I finally threw it away. Well, recycled actually. When not dumping old car batteries into ocean areas heavily populated with baby dolphins I like to be green.
Holy shit, some guy just busted in my room with a gun to my head telling me he’s going to kill me unless I can show him a visual representation of what quadratic equations look like in graph form…mother fucker.
I think I have to go.