#35 “And Then The Sun It Hit My Face And Made Me Thing Of All The Things That Made Me Pray”

#35 I Would Stay by The Dangerous Summer

Probably a little more than a year ago when I was back in community college I would listen to this song a lot on my walk to and from school. Probably like four or five times all together. It has that quality that all remaining songs on my list have, in that I can listen to them twice in a row – and as I get further on my list some songs are so good that not only did I want to listen to them twice in a row, but I had to listen to them two or three times in a row, otherwise I wouldn’t feel satisfied.

I really like this song, but as usual I don’t really have much to say. As of the past few weeks I haven’t really been writing that well, or putting my place in the state to write well. I’m starting to feel like I’m going to get really depressed again. Overall the past few months haven’t been that bad compared to the last couple years of my life, at least in an emotional sense. It’s weird because I haven’t really been doing anything productive in “life” the past couple months. I’ve been trying and failing at a lot of things, like getting a job, doing my crappy youtube videos, stuff like that. Maybe it’s just in the trying.

Today there was that whole the world’s going to end thing. I had heard about it from some people a couple weeks ago and completely forgot about it until a bunch of people brought it up last night. As you know I’m an atheist, so I wasn’t worried in the least. I was surprised how many religious people were really worried though. I met and talked to one religious girl last night who was a little freaked out about the whole thing. She was shocked to find out I was an atheist and said she’s pray for me and I did nothing in the way of arguing with her. She can believe what she wants and I can not believe what I want, no need to argue about it.

The idea of being judged pleases me. I certainly wouldn’t do well according to the Bible standards. I mean that arrogant fuck God wants people to love him beyond all else, but I think that’s a pretty unreasonable demand. Even if he does exist and did create all this does that mean I should love him above all else? I mean I wouldn’t be here without my biological father, but that fuck has nothing to do with my life, and as far as I know it neither does God. Of course religious people will tell you that God has a lot to do with your life always, but there’s really no proof of that, it’s just a bunch of people with no real basis for knowing anything about God being real saying stuff. I guess that’s where the faith comes in. My larger point is that once people find God in their life they will have already spent more time with their mom or dad or some other family member and bonded with them, and to think just because some guy standing in front of a pulpit is telling you God is the greatest and should be loved above all else it isn’t going to make anyone really love God more than they love the person they’ve spent their entire life bonding with. And frankly I’m scared for the person who would love God that quickly over someone who has really impacted their life. This isn’t me bashing God. This is me talking to myself.


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8 Responses to #35 “And Then The Sun It Hit My Face And Made Me Thing Of All The Things That Made Me Pray”

  1. sololos says:

    People need to stop even entertaining the notion of a rapture actually happening. In fact, it upsets me that you even mentioned it in your blog. In fact, I’m ashamed having even brought it up in this comment please delete this.

    • sololos says:

      BTW, don’t actually delete what I wrote.

    • Danniel says:

      I was just writing whatever came across my mind so I could post something and keep the song countdown going. But I actually am curious about it. I had no idea who really believed in it and who didn’t. I guess it was just one particular cult like thing or something…I’m not sure. But it was weird talking to that one religious person who seemed worried about it.

      I kind of honestly think that any person who takes their self up as a prophet of God should be imprisoned immediately. It’s just so fucked up to take advantage of people like that. I mean the church alone is already kind of weird. There’s no way that all these churches have preachers who have been taught and trained properly as to where they just teach about the bible while maintaining a certain distance from imparting their own views.

  2. I wish that people wouldn’t waste their lives in pursuit of an unlikely afterlife, because when it boils down to it, if someone is living that way they’re not really LIVING, if you know what I mean.

    • Danniel says:

      It’s difficult for me to say, I’m very afraid of death and would love an afterlife, but I’ve done enough thinking and searching to know that there’s no reason to believe there would be one. I just think most people in American were brought up with the believe in God, as was I, but luckily my mother didn’t force it down my throat so I was always free to question things for myself. I think often by the time people are old enough to start learning things for themselves they’ve already been “brainwashed” and can’t really imagine living a life without belief of God.

      I think a lot of good can come about from Religious organizations and the way they live their life. A lot of time it involves doing charitable work. But that can be done without belief in God. And things like that shouldn’t be done just because that’s what people think they need to do to get into the afterlife. One thing religion always tries to hold above nonbelievers is morality. But how moral is morality when it’s being done solely for the purpose of living for eternity?

      • sololos says:

        I find it more difficult to believe in an afterlife than god. Afterlife would imply we have souls and it seems unlikely that there would be a consciousness like that that is separate from the body and that is so far completely undetectable by any scientific means. At least a god would exist outside the universe and could just be something that created it.

        • Danniel says:

          I think the person saying the shit should be punish if he’s persistently trying to get people to believe in his cause, especially if he’s doing it in a cult like brainwashing fashion. I also think the dumb fucks who believe what he says are to blame as well, but nonetheless I still feel bad for them for some reason. I think their ardent belief of God is being taken advantage of by this so called preacher, but I really don’t know these people so they could have been just as crazy as him from the start. Probably at least a little crazy if they eventually believed the crap he was saying.

          I find it extremely difficult to believe in either or, but I agree that of the two the afterlife is more difficult because it’s so tried in with the believe in God, although nowadays it seems it might be heading away from that because people who don’t have a strong believe in God will still believe in ghosts and spiritually and having some kind of special connection to the universe which would imply there is some kind of soul like thing in each of us, especially for the idea of us being ghosts to be possible.

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