#48 I Am Fred Astaire by Taking Back Sunday
This song was very hard to place on the countdown because like many Taking Back Sunday songs I don’t listen to it as much as I did a few years ago when it was one of the songs I listened to most. And even though it’s higher on the countdown than Three of Six Taking Back Sunday songs (Bike Scene 79, MakeDamnSure 76, and You Know How I Do 59) it’s the song I like least at the moment. At this moment you’re thinking one of two things. Either, “Well then why is it higher on the list than those songs?” or “Why am I reading this crappy blog when I could be watching Glee?” Unfortunately I can only answer one of those questions for you. And the answer is because Glee is annoyingly kitsch (you’re just jealous) I wish I was as pretty as Lea Michele (sad face).
For some reason I can’t explain this song used to make me happy. It’s probably because of the repeated line, “I haven’t been happier since,” at the end of the song. It’s like that psychological self-help strategy: Step 1 tell yourself you’re wonderful. Step 2 repeat until you believe it or its entrenched so deep in your subconscious that you have to believe it. I have no idea if that’s actually a self-help psychology strategy. I just like to make up stuff and then immediately notify you that its complete crap.
For whatever reason it may have been this song was a go to for me when I felt down. Actually not really. Like most people when depressed I don’t actually want to help myself feel better. Instead I want to listen to sad music and do anything but try and forget about whatever pain I’m feeling. But occasionally when I was feeling down – not depressed, when I’m depressed there’s but one cure for the abyss I’ll throw myself into – this song would come on and it would put me in a good mood. For one it’d make me want to dance. I’m not sure if that was a reaction before or after I found out who Fred Astaire was. I’m pretty sure it was before because I still have no idea who Fred Astaire is – I actually do, that was just a lame attempt at humor.
When conducting this list I put a lot of stock into emotional value, and happiness falls under that, and might be subconsciously valued higher for me, both because being happy is a greater feeling than being sad, and most of the songs on the list I associate with sadness, so happiness is rarer – I almost deleted ‘greater feeling’ and replaced it with ‘better feeling’, in fact I did, but then I put it back because I wanted to add this part where I explain, like I did once before, that while happiness is no doubt a better feeling than sadness, I think sadness may be greater, and by greater I mean more potent and powerful, and has a stronger and much longer lasting hold on us feeble human beings. I don’t want to explain it further because I did once before, and also David just texted me telling me to get on skype, hopefully I won’t have to tell him I’m not into any dirty webcam stuff, although I’m not sure why I would worry about that because he’s never inquired to that before, which is actually hurtful. I know we’re not gay or anything, but it’s 2011 for Christ’s sake, bisexuality is everywhere, I feel like I’m ten times too straight for my era. And you may be thinking, “wait, you want to be gay?” No, I don’t want to be gay. I would hate to be gay. No offense to any gay people, there’s nothing wrong with them, they’re just as bad as straight people. My point is that bisexuality is where it’s at. As I’ve said many many many times before, it’s the best of both worlds. You get girls and guys, that’s like 98% of the population. If you’re gay you only get to be with your own sex and if you’re straight you only get to be with the opposite sex. That’s cutting out half the population. It’s a horrible sexual strategy. Unfortunately we don’t get to pick out our sexual preferences, so I’m stuck being straight, which is horribly unlucky for me because it’s well documented that for whatever reason women hate me. True story. You don’t believe me? Ask my penis. It’s never met a vagina.