Bedtime Thoughts 23

 

I can’t fucking sleep. I gave it my all, but I can’t do it. Way earlier in the night I said, “Fuck it” and decided to do some pushups in the dark in my underwear while writing an email to someone, and then I brushed my teeth because I had forgotten (forgotten in this instance means didn’t want to) earlier in the night and then I collapsed in bed for an hour and still haven’t been able to fall asleep. This is complete bullshit.

I’ve been thinking of her of course. I’m almost always thinking of her. Even when I masturbate I’m thinking of her. Not in the way you may think. She’s extremely sexy, but for some reason masturbating to thoughts of her just seem wrong. Instead I look at other women. Other women who aren’t her. And I wish she were with me so I wouldn’t waste so much time masturbating which I only partially do for pleasure, while I mostly do it out of boredom and to stop thinking, which doesn’t quite work as well as it once did.

I’m listening to The Icarus Account right now. The same The Icarus Account that left a comment on one of my blog posts because I had one of their songs at like 98^th on my list. Pretty cool moment. Had the list been made now they’d have more songs on the list. They’re easily in my top ten favorite bands. Okay, I’d have to think that further through to make that declaration. But I can say that they’ll easily be in my top ten favorite bands soon. So many of their songs touch home with me. Well not home as literal home. But home as in the home that is the soul housed within my body. Not that I necessarily believe in souls. The song Anchors Away particularly hits the metaphorical home with me,

“Every time I miss you I’m afraid that you’ve found someone else. That every thought I’ve spent on you is another moment here that I’ve lost. You don’t have time to talk, am I a memory that you’ve forgot? And what scares me most is how I’ve fall, I’ve fall, I’ve fallen for you. Hook line and sinker to every part of my heart.”

We’ve gone weeks, even months without talking before, but she always eventually talks to me again, but this time it feels different. Okay, that’s a complete lie. It feels exactly the same. But it’s still a shitty feeling. And it’s still a feeling of not knowing if she’ll ever talk to me again. It’s weird because I feel so close to her, but if she was going out with someone I don’t think she’d ever feel the need to talk to me. I don’t think it’s as cold as it sounds. I think she knows that we can’t just be friends. Or maybe it is just her not wanting to break my heart with that news? Or maybe she just found a guy who makes her happy and she forgot all about me? If it’s the first case I’d rather have the broken heart. If it’s the second then I’m happy for her.

I don’t feel like writing this has gotten me any closer to sleep. And now I’m hungry. I can’t wait to make breakfast in the morning, whenever morning might come for me. Now it feels like one of those nights where once I finally get to sleep I might sleep for ten or twelve hours, which is not something I’d like to do.

I guess I’m just gonna write until I fall asleep. Not write this. I’m done writing this.

The Icarus Account’s Sunshine and Rain EP Review Part two (a semblance of reviewing actually takes place)

I was having trouble writing this so I decided to erase every single word and start from scratch. I’m making it sound more dramatic than it really was. It was only 87 words, but I really enjoyed that Dharma and Greg joke, and to think no one will ever get to see it really eats at the soul I don’t have. However the day has not been a complete loss. I figured out a way to warm up my feet. I shall sit on my socks. I will let you know how it turns out later.

This is going to be an unconventional review of sorts. There’s a very good chance by the end you will have learned nothing about any of the four songs on the EP, but at least I will have linked you to the songs and hopefully you’ll have listened to at least one or two and share your thoughts with me, or at least for no other reason than being bored you could call me an idiot, even if you really enjoy the songs. It’s not that hard. Just write the three words “You’re an idiot’, click ‘post comment’ and voila, I get to know I’m an idiot, and you might get some enjoyment because people tell me it’s very pleasurable to make fun of me. So if you get nothing else for this post at least listen to some good music and call me an idiot.

The first song on the EP is Favorite Girl. This is certainly an upbeat happy song. This song is more enjoyable if you happen to be in love with someone, as opposed to being a nasty old curmudgeon such as myself. But nonetheless I still enjoy the song. It’s hard to say how much I like this song, or really any of the songs on the EP, because when I first started listening to The Icarus Account I originally only had about five or six of their songs on my ipod, and the other songs I just thought were okay, but as the months progressed I started to find the good in other of their songs and now I have 18 of their songs on my ipod, not counting the four from this EP. So in a month from now I could like any of these four songs considerably more than I do right now, that’s not to say that I don’t like them now. I liked Dear Love, More To Me, Closer To You and Anchors Away when I first heard them, but it took awhile before I loved them as much as I do now.

By the way, I figure now is the apt time to mention this, you can listen to almost all of their songs on their youtube page, which hopefully I linked there, and you can listen to the songs on the EP their too or at their purevolume page and probably their myspace page too or somewhere or other, or you could be old fashion and buy the EP or any of their other songs on Amazon or itunes. The EP is only four dollars. That’s less than it costs to get a handy from the crazy Korean man behind the Vietnamese restaurant next to my house. Why a Korean man is behind a Vietnamese restaurant I’ll never know. Why he’s giving hands jobs for so cheap, sadly I do know. Oh yeah, at purevolume.com/theicarusaccount you can download Favorite Girl for free. I know if he had a computer that Korean man would.

I’m going to make the rest of this short and to the point because I’m running out of time. Time for what, I’m not quite certain. Come Back Home is okay, the last part of the song is my favorite. Sunshine and Rain is good, and it’s very possible that a month from now it will be my favorite song on the EP, and Yellow Shirt is at the moment my favorite song on the EP.

Now I know this was a half hearted review, and you want your time and money back. Well I can’t give you your time back, and even though I technically didn’t take your money, I’m going to give you something better than money, Amazon mp3 money. My friend who is a geek…I mean nice guy finds a lot of deals online and recently he found a promotional code for Amazon.com for three dollars that you can put towards buying mp3s. All you have to do is click on the link provided, enter the code that will be on the page and you’ll have three dollars towards mp3s added to your account. You can thank my friend by visiting his wordpress site techymarketer.wordpress.com and telling him thank you – for the love of God be funny about it and don’s specify why you’re thanking him – or you can just spam the hell out of his site, either way I’m happy.

Free $3 from Amazon code link…[expires November 29th, 2010, so hurry]

Hmm, so now you have three dollars to spend at Amazon on mp3s, but unfortunately The Icarus Account’s EP Sunshine and Rain costs four dollars, so whatever shall you do? I know, since you can download Favorite Girl for free on their purevolume page you can use the free three dollars I just gave you to buy the other three tracks on the EP.  Technically you can put the money towards any mp3s on Amazon, but it’d be nice if you at least bought one of The Icarus Account’s songs since I mentioned them here, just for the love of God don’t buy any Lady Gaga songs or I will be forced to punish myself shamefully for accidentally doing her evil bidding.

This song isn’t on the new EP, I just love it so damn much in such a terribly sad way

The Icarus Account’s Sunshine and Rain EP Review part one (there isn’t any reviewing in this part)

So something pretty cool happened not too long ago. I’ve been writing my list of favorite songs and at number 98 was The Icarus Account’s So In Love, but to be honest quite a few of their songs could have made the list, but since I’ve only known of them for about six months and went with one song I chose So In Love to represent them, which is weird because I haven’t been in love for a while, so I feel like I should resent that song for mocking my dumb un-in-love ass. Not that my dumb ass is un-in-love on purpose. My dumb ass also wasn’t expecting what happened next.

I still don't know which one's which

A few weeks after I posted the blog I received a comment from some guy named Trey who claimed to be from The Icarus Account. At first I was hesitant to believe it was really him, but after I emailed him I was assured of it…and that’s when I gave him my credit card information. Kidding of course. I wasn’t really hesitant in believing it was him because, and no offense to the band, I don’t think people go around pretending to be the guys from The Icarus Account, although I think that’s the way to go. Why pretend to be the big time celebrity? No one will believe it. Instead be a smaller celebrity, that way no one will question it because no one will know who you are anyway.

So I emailed Trey – I wasn’t stalking him, he told me to, I swear – and he mentioned they were coming out with a new EP and said it’d be cool if I wrote a review or something on it if I liked some songs. Well I listened and I liked and the review will be coming, but first I want to mention a few things.

The Icarus Account seem to be cool guys. In the few words I had with Trey he seemed extremely nice. And then I found this other blog where The Icarus Account allowed who I think is a high school girl to interview them. And if you go to their youtube page they have a couple tutorials of how to play their songs acoustically. It’s nothing eye popping but it’s still a cool thing to do. Now that the nice is out of the way let’s get to the many things I hate about them. First up on my list of 456 things…kidding. Although, and this may be too much to ask of them, but if they could somehow find a way to turn into two extremely hot chicks I think that would bump them up a few spots on my list of favorite bands.

Another thing this reminded me of was the time I wrote a blog on Myspace about the man with the world’s largest penis – 13 and a half inches – and I mentioned how I couldn’t find any pictures of his penis (curious why you were looking so hard) and then the man with the world’s largest penis left a comment saying that if I wanted to see it so bad he’d send me a picture. I’m pretty sure he was joking. I was even more sure when he kept refusing to show me when I asked. That’s a joke, I didn’t actually ask. Seeing a penis that big would only give me nightmares. I think it’s pretty cool that I’ve had Trey from The Icarus Account and the man with the world’s largest penis both comment on my blog. Although it could be cooler.

It’s times like this I wish I was a sixteen year old girl. Not because of the obvious reason of being on the cheer squad in hopes of the hunk starting quarterback noticing me, but rather because teen girls go crazy over the people they like. I think it’s cool that Trey left me a comment, but if I was a sixteen year old girl and got a comment on my blog from the guy from one of my top ten favorite bands I’d go crazy and tell all my friends how he was totally into me and would totally sleep with me – I’ll get back to that in a second. Two things wrong with that though. 1) If I was a teenaged girl I wouldn’t have a convention blog, but would probably have one of those tumblr things where I would mostly post pictures. And 2) if I was a teenaged girl I probably wouldn’t know who The Icarus Account is and instead would be listening to Justin Bieber over and over again. I’ve never been more happy to not be a sixteen year old girl. And actually I think The Icarus Account has a lot of teen girl fans. For all the teen boys out there, those are the girls you need to keep your eyes on for future wooing, not the girls who like Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga, who may be easier to get when you’re in college, but in the long run aren’t the way to go.

I mentioned the thing about the girl saying that the guy would totally sleep with her because I once had a conversation with a girl who at the time was sixteen – I wasn’t being creepy pedophileish, I was sixteen at the time too, although going out of my way to mention that I was sixteen makes me seem like I’m trying to defend myself, which means I must be hiding something, although I don’t think I am – and she told me about how she was at an All American Rejects concert and the lead singer made eye contact with her – the lead singer who multiple people have told me I look like when I have long hair, but I don’t see it – and she said there was a connection between them and that she could have easily slept with him. I don’t doubt that. However I don’t think it’s because there was a connection. I think it’s because most guys are pigs and will sleep with anything relatively attractive – she was more than relatively attractive.

I think I’m going to make this a two parter. So click on the link below to read my review of The Icarus Account’s Sunshine and Rain EP. If there’s no link below then please leave me a comment calling me an idiot because I forgot to include the link.

Part two can be found here

#98: So In Love by The Icarus Account (acoustic)

I like having this band on the list because I don’t think many people have heard of them. The Icarus Account is made up of twin brothers who don’t look super similar, but you can tell they’re brothers, that or gay lovers who clearly fantasized of sleeping with themselves as kids. Their names are Ty and Trey, which I don’t like at all. When I am King of Oregon, California, Nevada, Utah and parts of Arizona and Colorado I’m making it a sin to give your kids names starting with the same letter, and double sinful if they’re twins and triple sinful for triplets and so forth. It’s too cheesy. When I am king Inanity with run rampant no more.

So In Love wasn’t my original pick for this spot. I had the song Farewell For Now by the same band here but I couldn’t find a good quality video on youtube of it and since I was struggling between that song, the one I chose and the song Only One it wasn’t that big of a deal – later on the list there will also be a song that so far I haven’t found on youtube and because it’s a top 25 song on my list I will upload it myself, but since this is number 98 I’m not going to burn any calories, and I don’t mean that in a figurative way, I have a rule that whenever I upload a video on youtube I have to work out for an hour, crazy rule, but until I can get the signatures required to get it overturned I have to live with it.

I think I like listening to the songs So In Love and Only One better than Farewell For Now, but Farewell For Now means more to me (which is also the name of another good The Icarus Account song), and I know this because it’s one of the songs I can’t listen to at certain points because it makes me think about something I sometimes don’t want to be thinking about. Pretty much any song that can do that means something to me and quite a few of those will be on the list.

“And it’s clear that distance is our enemy for now, but if it’s meant to be then it will be somehow.” Those are lyrics from Farewell For Now that hit me especially hard. Those of you that know me know that I’m in love with a girl who doesn’t live close to me. She’s not that far, only a couple states away, but when you don’t have a car or much money distance can be a skinny bitch – I went with skinny because the usual ‘big bitch’ might put the image of a fat chick in people’s minds and skinny girls are bitches too…and now I realize that by assuming that I’m implying that bitch is connected with girls which I would say is sexist if it weren’t true.

Quick kind of tangent. I don’t recommend long distance relationships unless it’s a long term relationship that has already been established beforehand and it will only be for a short amount of time, or if the chick is super awesome and amazing and hot and even though you lie in bed at night with heart pains because you can’t hold her it’s still worth it because you believe, even if it’s stupidity, that one day you’ll be together and it will be magical. As you all know I’m retarded – I can say retarded and still be politically correct because I’m almost sure I must be mentally challenged. Of the top five girls I’ve liked most in my life only one of them has lived in the same state as me (not same city), and I’ve met all of them a combined one time. But here’s how I feel. What are the chances the girl I would get along with best and fall in love with most would live near me? I don’t live in a small town, but I strongly doubt that the person I would want to be with most is among the million people who live in the tri-city area. I’m sure there’s plenty of people I could love here, but could love isn’t the same as falling madly in love with. I’m just not the type of person who can settle (that attitude will change when you’re 50, alone and still a virgin) most assuredly. So even though I’m against long distance relationships it makes complete sense to me that a person would more likely be ‘meant’ for a person not living near them then the relative few in that person’s area.

“So I guess this is farewell for now. I’ll find you in the end somehow.” Again from Farewell For Now, and again eerily reminiscence of the situation I have been put in with this girl I am distanced from. It’s agreed upon that we can’t be together now (more so on her part), but we feel, or at least I feel, or at least I used to be more sure, that in the end we’d end up together. So I guess it’s not surprising that I skip this song sometimes when it pops up in the shuffle because it brings up sad thoughts. On the other hand both So In Love and Only One make me happy when I listen to them.

Both songs have simple if not cheesy lyrics. “I love the way that you say my name. I love the way that you hold my hand. Like we’re so in love. Cause we’re so in love. Yeah we’re so in love” (So In Love). Very simple, but I don’t mind. Sometimes simple is enough. I don’t know about the holding hands part because I’ve never really experienced that, but there’s something about hearing someone I like saying my name that puts a smile on my face. I’ve heard before that people like it when you say their name for whatever reason. Apparently it’s a good strategy to use when trying to pick up chicks, and also you’ve might have noticed that politicians say the names of people they’re addressing a lot. Like if someone in the audience named Corey asks a question you’ll hear the politician respond to Corey directly by name no fewer than five times. And anything politicians do must be trickery.

The Icarus Account is an up and coming band for me with usually simple but emotional lyrics and nice guitar work. If I was doing this list a year from now I think the three songs I’ve mentioned today would make the list and then two others might squeeze their way in. In the six months since I’ve discovered the band (yes, discovered, just like Columbus discovered America even though thousands and thousands of people had already been living there before) I’ve already listened to them 535 times (information provided by lastfm.com) and that’s not counting the 30 times I’ve listened to them while writing this and talking to Eva.  I expect big things from them in the future. Well big to me, but not to the general public. I predict in the next ten years less people will have listened to this band then girls have had Justin Bieber snort cocaine off their tits – if I threw in him snorting cocaine off dicks it wouldn’t be close.

….

A link to Chris and I talking about the “Boob N’ Nipple Crisis”